Love will slowly become insipid, but will not dissipate.
there is a sentence
it is well said that we can build the same boat in ten years and sleep together in a hundred years.
it is easy to fall in love, but difficult to get along with each other. Not every marriage can come to the end, and not every couple can achieve equal respect, understanding and tolerance in their marriage.
the family dispute case we are going to talk about today is a typical example of a couple turning into a grievant couple.
43-year-old Tian Lei and Qian Jiawen have known each other since the age of 18 and married at the age of 21. They have been together for 20 years.
Tian Lei said, "I do all by myself to be obedient to her, wash clothes and cook, and work hard to earn money outside."
after marriage, they have two lovely daughters, not to mention rich and expensive, from being poor and white to having a car and a house, which can be regarded as having food and clothing.
but his wife, Qian Jiawen, did not hesitate to leave the house to end the marriage, and even went on hunger strike to force herself.
my wife also said, "I'd rather laugh in a tricycle than cry in a BMW."
his wife suddenly divorced him, which puzzled Tian Lei.
I have tried many ways to make my wife change her mind and go back to her.
even mobilized the whole family and friends to do ideological work for Jia Wen, but his wife was determined to divorce her.
in desperation, Tian Lei had to turn to the variety show "looking for Love".
is it really like what Tian Lei said: the relationship between the two is very strong, and the wife is having an affair, so he insists on leaving?
with the mediation of the program group, Qian Jiawen tearfully revealed the real reason for her firm divorce:
the Tian family has always wanted a boy. During 20 years, Qian Jiawen conceived 15 times and aborted 13 times, twice because she was unable to have an abortion and chose to give birth to a girl.
after repeated induction of labor, the wife's body also fell to the root of the disease.
and these physical and mental injuries to Qian Jiawen can never be made up for by Tian Lei.
Qian Jiawen also said that the couple are not as affectionate as Tian Lei said. Everything is the image of a good husband he has created for himself, and he chose to divorce because he can't live any longer.
Qian Jiawen uses the word "binding" to describe these 20 years of life, which is a far cry from what Tian Lei said.
Tian Lei always turns a blind eye to this. He thinks it's just an excuse for his wife to get a divorce.
in his mind, to provide his wife with material satisfaction is the greatest "good" to her.
he doesn't know that in his wife's heart, all he wants is respect and love.
and Tian Lei never really respected and loved his wife, but only used his wife as a fertility tool.
Qian Jiawen, his heartbroken wife, is no longer full of expectations for this marriage.
but in real life, marriages that die of "self-righteous giving" are not in the minority.
on the one hand, moral kidnapping partner "I have done so much for you, why are you not satisfied";
on the other hand, they never know how to respect and care for their partner.
Dress curvaceous in our collection of wedding dress for winter wedding . Shop with us for the quality and fabulous prices.
if the relationship between partners is not respected, the relationship is not equal, and the relationship is also unbalanced.
and an unbalanced relationship is often difficult to maintain for a long time.
emotional mentor Tu Lei once said: "good love has three elements: mutual respect, mutual understanding, and mutual need."
reviewing the interview of the famous director Ang Lee made me feel deeply about "respect".
Lu Yu asked Ang Lee on the program:
"what is your greatest happiness at this stage?"
Ang Lee replied:
"if my wife can smile at me, I will relax a little bit and I will feel very happy.
you still have to come every day to earn their respect, and you have to meet a standard. This is one of the reasons why I am not slack off. "
such a simple and sincere answer is a kind of extreme romantic words.
before his thirties, Ang Lee had accomplished nothing and was depressed.
but he is better than having a good wife.
his wife, Lin Huijia, has always respected Ang Lee's movie dream, silently accompanied and supported him in action and spirit, and worked outside as a drug researcher to support his family.
Ang Lee does all the housework at home every day, in addition to reading a lot, watching movies and studying scripts. He is responsible for buying food, cooking and taking care of the children.
the efforts and hard work between husband and wife are mutual.
this life lasted for six years.
from obscurity at that time to the most famous Chinese director in the world today, his wife is grateful to him, and he is also full of gratitude to his wife. When accepting the award, Ang Lee said proudly:
"I have never quarreled with my wife in 30 years of marriage, because I am a henpecked person, and I always feel that everything my wife says is right." With such a wife in charge, how can there be no reason not to succeed? "
is it true that when you become famous and become a big director, you can naturally get the respect and love of your wife?
I don't think so.
It is because Ang Lee has always known how to respect and be grateful to his wife.
this is especially true in marriage. Respect is more important than love. Only a husband and wife who respect each other can be happy and long-term.
in the movie Ip Man 3, there is a line deeply rooted in the hearts of the people: "there is no man who is afraid of his wife, only a man who respects his wife."
in fact, most women are born receptive creatures, and the more her husband respects and takes care of her, the happier she will feel.
when CCTV's variety show "Hello Life" was a hit, many people were attracted by Kanghui.
in one program, Kang Hui lost a game. According to the rules of the game, he had to call his wife in public to express his love. Without letting her know that he was recording the program, he said, "I love you."
after the phone was connected, a sweet smile appeared on Kanghui's face when he heard his wife's voice.
several hosts were moved by the gentleness of his phone call.
A more enviable detail is that after the phone call, Kanghui said with a smile, "I must tell her what's going on. I have to respect my wife's opinion whether the phone content should be broadcast or not."
A guest booed and said, "her opinion is no longer important."
he retorted solemnly: "No, her opinion is very important!"
after 22 years of marriage, Kanghui and his wife still feel like they are madly in love.
in his view, the premise of love is respect. Only by putting each other in an equal position, respecting and caring for her, can marriage last longer.
the so-called husband and wife is not licensed, living together is husband and wife, but the husband can always do it and respect his wife from the bottom of his heart.
you don't slack off just because you're ripe, and you don't muddle through just because you're close.
only when we can do this, can we really show a man's top charm.
it is undeniable that some people are like Tian Lei in Love search:
except that you can satisfy you materially, but never give you the equality, respect, care and love you really want, then the relationship will always collapse and lose warmth and happiness.
such people will only make you suspect for a time that you are only regarded as a fertility machine.
may even disappoint you and feel that marriage is unbearable.
Love will slowly become insipid, but it will not dissipate.
No one can live in a romantic and passionate relationship forever. A happy marriage requires two people to maintain and manage together.
, may we all learn to respect and care for each other in plain love and marriage.