When people reach middle age, they learn to be kind and tolerant.
there is a sentence in the movie the Godfather:
"A soft heart without a boundary will only allow the other party to gain an inch.
unprincipled kindness will only let the other party do whatever he or she wants.
in this life, you should be kind, but don't be too soft.
otherwise, you will indulge others and hurt yourself.
especially in middle age, people no longer have as much time and energy as they did when they were young, and they should learn to devote their limited feelings to people who are worthy of it.
Please put away your softness when you reach middle age.
not everyone deserves your softness
A voice like this is always heard in life:
"Thank you for those who tripped you, for they have achieved your glory;
Thank the people who hurt you, because they taught you to be strong. "
do you know that those who trip you will only feel good behind your back, and those who hurt you will never feel your desolation.
it is true that not everyone in this world is worthy of your softness.
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once shared the tragedy caused by unlimited softness.
Heidi originally had an enviable job and had a bright future.
the department she is in charge of docking with live sales is the core department of the company. if a mistake occurs, both the supplier and the company will suffer huge losses.
once, an employee of the Heidi department lost tens of thousands of yuan because he carelessly marked down the price of a piece of clothing.
afterwards, the department director investigated and blamed her, and the employee found her and pleaded with tears.
the employee told her that her family conditions were very difficult, her parents-in-law were sick, the children went to school, and her husband could only get a basic salary, and the whole family made money on their own.
when Heidi heard this, he felt pity and promised to help his employees take things down.
she told the director that the broadcast accident was caused by her poor management, which had nothing to do with the employee.
Heidi originally thought that the company would compensate for losses and withhold bonuses in accordance with the previous system, but she was also prepared not to take quarterly bonuses.
who ever thought that the supplier complained to the boss about this matter, requiring the company to severely punish the key personnel who caused the live broadcast accident.
in order to protect the company's reputation, the boss had to issue a dismissal order.
at this time, Heidi went to the employee and asked her to help explain and intercede with the company for understanding.
as a result, instead of feeling guilty, the employee fought back and killed Heidi, which caused the broadcast accident.
the employee stayed in the company with peace of mind and continued to work.
Jin Yong wrote:
"people in the rivers and lakes are sinister and treat friends, of course, benevolence and righteousness comes first.
but if you treat a villain with a soft heart, you will be fooled. "
if kindness is given to the wrong person, it can only be deceived; if a soft heart is given to the wrong person, it will only hurt itself.
not everyone is grateful when he is alive.
when you reach middle age, don't be soft on others easily.
to be soft on people who are not worth it is to hurt yourself
the writer Zhou Guoping told the story of a "scoundrel" in his book when you learn to be alone.
once, the scoundrel borrowed a sum of money from a friend.
A few days later, his friend urged him to pay back the money, but he blushed and shouted:
"Why do you care so much that you have come to collect debts after only a few days?"
A friend smiled awkwardly and felt that as a friend, he should really think about each other, so he pressed not to mention it.
three years later, when a friend urged him to return it, the scoundrel shouted angrily, "how long have you been worrying like this?"
as he talked, he became angrier and angrier, and finally announced to everyone around him that he was going to sever relations with the man who was "unworthy" to be his friend.
in this way, my friend was kind enough to lend money to the scoundrel, but he was defaulted again and again by the scoundrel, leaving a bad reputation for being "stingy and calculating".
A kind heart, because it is soft, hurts itself in the end.
Dong Qing said:
"if you are good enough to be unreserved, the other person will dare to be unscrupulous."
not everyone deserves to be treated with your heart for a lifetime.
some people often take advantage of your softness to hurt you indefinitely.
when they are free, they ask you to pick up a courier "by the way". If you refuse, you will be satirized and unfriendly.
they ask you to buy something "by the way", but you complain about it when you buy it back.
kindness should be divided into different people, and don't be the same to everyone, otherwise it is tantamount to encouraging others to do evil.
once upon a time, a farmer sat by the water and found a scorpion fell into the water.
later, the scorpion fell into the water frequently, and the farmer was worried that the scorpion would be drowned, so he salvaged it again and again.I get stung every time.
as a result, the scorpion did not die, but the farmer was poisoned by the scorpion and died.
the writer Guiyuan once wrote such a sentence:
"this is a game of life and death, she is soft-hearted, but he is determined, and in exchange for it in the end, it is a total loss."
the greatest stupidity of human nature is boundless tolerance.
in a society where the law of the jungle is the prey of the jungle, it is not that if you are patient with others, others will be soft on you.
when people reach middle age, it is the greatest kindness to keep themselves from hurting others.
when people reach middle age, they learn to be cruel to people who are not worth it.
the famous movie star, Meryl Streep, once said:
"I am no longer patient with certain things, not because I have become proud.
I think so.
when people reach middle age and half a slope, life becomes heavy and soft on people who are not worth it, and they will consume themselves more because of this bottomless goodwill.
just like a survey conducted by Harvard University, the study found that
if a person learns to refuse reasonably, he can reduce unnecessary trouble by more than 90%, and will not waste a lot of personal time and wealth.
the beginning of loving yourself is to stop pleasing and learn to refuse for the rest of your life.
Qigong, a master of calligraphy and painting, knows this very well.
at first, he was embarrassed to refuse the beggar's request, and he responded to almost everything, regardless of his rank or inferiority.
later, more and more people asked for words, which seriously affected his work. He realized that he could no longer go soft, or he would only add to his troubles.
once, a well-known art dealer visited Qigong's home and asked for his works.
Mr. Qigong knew what he meant, but he smiled and asked the art dealer:
"what can I do for you?"
the painter casually replied, "I've come to see you."
after listening to Qigong, he went to him and turned around twice.
even raised his feet, let the art dealer see it all over, and then smiled and said:
"after reading it, please go back!"
although the art dealer had no choice but to leave with a wry smile.
from then on, he often refused to face people who came to ask for words.
instead of wasting any energy on outsiders, he spent half his life loving his wife.
after his wife fell ill, he took care of it with the nurse during the day and went home at night. He sat on the chair in front of the hospital bed by himself and accompanied his wife day after day.
even in the 30 years after his wife's death, he was deeply missed.
when you reach middle age, be hard on those who are not worth it, pay less unnecessarily, and devote more time and energy to yourself and important people.
Yi Shu has an excellent saying:
"I have only one life, and I can't give generously to people I don't love."
being soft-hearted is not a bad thing, but in middle age, if you damage yourself because of softness, it is not kindness, but stupidity.
because he is soft-hearted and does not know how to weigh, it is not atmosphere, it is self-abuse.
remember, your soft heart should be left to someone who deserves it.
finally, I would like to share with you two verses of Gu Cheng:
"roses wear sharp thorns and do not turn into thorns. It just defends its Chunhua from being ravaged by wild animals. "
when one reaches middle age, one learns to be kind and tolerant.
it is a man's greatest wisdom to give up unnecessary softness.
, share with your friends.
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